I'm coming home!!! Woo wee!! My flight leaves at 8:30am on Tuesday, August 4th, and I will be in Idaho Falls by 1:00pm. I get to see my seester and brother in law and Gramma and Crapa! I am one happy girl! Now, in the meantime, I need to make a list of all of the things I simply must do when I arrive home. Not only does it help the time until I'm actually home to go by more quickly, but because I like to obsess over making everything perfect, creating lists helps me to feel all nice and happy inside. Don't hate.
THE LIST
1) Assess the stank. Confused? Allow me to elaborate: Before Thomas and I left for Virginia in May, I forgot to pay our power bill. Can you see where this is going? No power + Stank?? eh?? Yes. I left food in our freezer and refrigerator, and because I didn't pay the bill, the power was shut off and the food went bad and as a result, my entire apartment became one giant stank. By the time the power company got the message that our address had changed for the summer and sent us a bill, the power had already been shut off. They never bothered to call me to tell me I had a payment that was late. They just shut it off. How lovely of them. So, when I received a rather large bill in the mail, I was positively cornfuzed because I didn't think we would have a power bill while in Virginia, because everything but our REFRIGERATOR was unplugged and the air and lights were turned off. So for the first couple of months we were out here, I didn't think anything of the fact that we weren't getting a power bill. So when I finally DID get a bill, I called the power company because I was confused about the amount due, and sure enough, it turns out that I am just a ditz and forgot to pay the bill amongst all of the hullabaloo of finals and packing to leave for the summer. SO I then proceeded to call the apartment office and asked the office girl if she would mind moseying over to my apartment and assessing the damage. She called back with bad news: My apartment stunk. Really stunk. Stunk BADLY. All I had in the fridge were condiments, but the freezer had frozen vegetables, berries, and if I remember correctly, it contained chicken as well....I know. I had to call a cleaning service to go over there and throw everything away and clean out the fridge. Then I mailed Jennifer (she's the office girl) about 5 Bath and Body Works Scent Ports (autumn apple, mmm!) which she proceeded to plug in throughout my stanky apartment. She was also sweet enough to leave my windows open during the day for a few days, and scrubbed down my kitchen counters with Pine Sol. I called the office a few days ago for an update, and Jennifer reported that not only was our refrigerator not damaged, but the stank was almost completely gone and in its place was an overwhelming apple scent which one could smell even in the airway outside of our apartment. I'm not really sure if this is a good thing or a bad thing...it would be good if the fridge stink was completely gone and in it's PLACE was an overwhelming apple scent. But if it ends up smelling like rotted food stank merely covered up by autumn apple, I think I just may vomit. We shall see. I must assess. Ergo, number one: Assess the stank.
Don't you just love how I can turn one item on a list into an entire novel? MOVING ON...
2) Wash the sheets on my bed. Yes, I washed them right before we left, but what if there is a creepy crawler in there? What if the stank permeated the sheets? What if a homeless guy broke into my apartment and decided to take a nap?? You never know.
3) Sleep in my wonderful, glorious, heavenly, beautiful, king size, cushy, soft, comfy bed. You would describe it in the same way if you had been sharing a too-firm-for-your-taste queen with your 6'4" husband all summer long. That man flops around in bed like a salmon swimming upstream, which causes me to bounce and shimmy and shake! In our bed at home I never had this problem because it is a cushy pillow top, but here, no such luck.
4) Clean out our entry way closet. We've got it all in there: Christmas decorations, my old bed frame, headboard and foot board, an old vacuum, an electric blanket, board games, and who knows what else....know anyone that needs a vacuum??
5) Clean out the trunk of my car. What can I say? It's embarrassing for me to open my trunk in a parking lot. I just know all of those complete strangers are simply dying to get a look at the inside of my trunk, and when they see how stuffed full of junk it is, they snigger and scoff at me, and then proceed to go home and tell all of their friends what a loser I am for having such a junky trunk. I am ashamed. But that's all going to change as soon as I get home! You'll see!!
6) Finish my Kinkade knockoff. Why on earth would I spend $1100 on an image that was printed onto a canvas and then dabbed with paint in a few spots (by some dude who is not even Mr. Kinkade, mind you) when I could have a mediocre reproduction of the same image that was 100% oil??? Oh yeah. I'm painting my own Megan Whittington original of Thomas Kinkade's Rainy Dusk, Paris. And it will be...adequate. But it will have only cost about $25! Top that!
I am really going to miss Thomas for the two and a half weeks we're going to be separated, and I will probably cry and whine and complain and wish I had never left his side. But honestly, I need to get out of this place. The oven shuts itself off when you try to use it so it only halfway bakes stuff, and only one of the big burners works. The washing machine also shuts itself off mid-cycle, in addition to not spinning the clothes dry at the end of the cycle half the time. The person who lived here before us was a chain smoker, and despite my best efforts, it STILL reeks of cigarette smoke. The couches are the color of cat poo, and there's carpet in the bathroom for Pete's sake!!! It really isn't that bad of a place, and I am really grateful that we were able to come out here so Thomas could make some money this summer. But that old saying really is true: there's no place like home! And I am so excited that HOME is where I'm going to be so soon!!!
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